- Sean O’Grady is Head of Trust and Security at Pocket Worlds.
- Before that, he worked at TikTok.
- He says there are good resources to help parents navigate the complexities of online safety.
This essay as stated is based on a conversation with Sean O’Gradyhead of Trust and Security at Pocket world. It has been edited for length and clarity.
When I was younger, games played a fundamental role in my life. My brother and I loved it pretend worlds where our Nintendo took us through games like Mario and Zelda. I spent long nights with my uncle playing Tetris. Later, PC games like Civilization fueled my love of history and encouraged me to learn more about the societies that have shaped our world.
As an adult, I have become interested in both the promise and the dangers of the Internet, online gamesand applications. I thought of the Internet as the ocean: it’s a wonder, but also very dangerous. Navigating it is very complex.
I worked in trust and safety on TikTokand now in the company he runs Heightan online game mainly for young women. I’m also a father of a daughter — my daughters are 4 and 7 — so I’m thinking more about online safety not just for my kids, but for all young people. Here’s how all parents can help keep children and teens safe online.
Encouraging resilience in children
My wife would like it if our kids never played online because she thinks it’s safer. I just don’t think it’s realistic. Eliminate screen time entirely from children or teenagers put them behind the curve.
Instead, we should promote resilience in children and adolescents. Talk to them clearly about the dangers that exist online – just as you do about the dangers in the real world. Build digital literacy and remind them that they should never accept cyberbullying or other harmful behavior. Remind children that they can always come to you if they feel uncomfortable with online behavior, just as they would if they encountered that behavior at school.
Don’t let the online take away from the real world
I served with the army in Iraq and Afghanistan. When we were settled, games could provide a break from a really harsh reality. This was a good thing, but I soon noticed the problematic side of things. People stayed up until 3am playing games when they were supposed to be on duty at 5am. Their performance suffered.
Parents should know how online games and activities affect the real life of teenagers. As games have become more complex, it’s easier to get involved in them. Teenagers can easily lose track of the time and responsibilities they need to take care of.
Discuss anonymity
When my generation played, we couldn’t be anonymous because whoever we were playing with was sitting next to us on the couch. Today, online anonymity is beyond the imagination of any early gamer.
Educate children about how anonymity can lead to harassment, exploitation and misinformation. Remind them that anonymous people sometimes feel emboldened to say or do things they wouldn’t do otherwise.
Talk about gaming expenses
These days, gamers can spend real money buying accessories for their games online. Even kids love to buy Robux, the virtual currency for the popular game Roblox. Not only can these expenses have a real impact on finances, but they can also open the door to manipulation.
Remind kids to never transact directly with another user, but go through the app. Never share credit card information or potential security questions like your pets’ names.
Spend time on parental controls
When I was on TikTok, a friend complained to me about his little girl watching videos of girls dancing in bikinis. I pointed out that the girl was too young for a TikTok account and the father said she was just using his account. It turns out those videos were the ones the algorithm knew it wanted to see.
Content protections for kids won’t work if parents aren’t making the world available for them to use. For example, I admire the parental controls on YouTube Kids. Setting them up for our kids takes work up front, but it’s worth it.
Use resources to help you
Parenting children who are engaged on the Internet becomes more complicated every day. Fortunately, parents don’t have to do this alone. Teams like mine are working proactively to reduce risks at a systemic level, while organizations are also taking a stand.
NetSmartz helps teens and their parents understand how to respond if they see inappropriate content online. Common sense media helps parents understand which movies, games and apps are appropriate for different ages and Family Safety Institute online there are many good resources for parents.
I come from a family of police officers and have always felt the call to serve and protect. I did that with the military, and I’m sure I’m doing it now promoting Internet security.
